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Warning! I am a satirist! If you do not have a sense of humor or are easily-offended, these blogs may not be for you. May I interest you in an innocuous episode of Peppa Pig instead?
Rubbery People Make For Resilient People
"All's Well As Ends Better."
To all who visited and commented on my blog last week, I am doing just fine. Thank you for your concern and for chiming in. I appreciate it! As the Gaffer said in The Return of the King, "All's well as ends better."
You see, one goes through challenges in one’s life and career, and one can never be sure where one’s journey will take one. But one thing one knows is that when the journey is done, one will have won one victory for one’s cause of oneness, because one’s one thing to remember is one thing and one thing only: one’s day will one day be wonderfully won.
Are there any questions.
Look, I am a sensitive guy. Like you, I too, cry when I watch those heartwarming commercials about tuna fish...Bic razors…surfboards. And especially those commercials about tuna fish using Bic Razors while riding surfboards. I weep like a baby with the rest of them. But when you take too many hits - even perceived hits - to your hull, it can weaken your structural integrity. By “weaken your structural integrity” I mean when you drink a gallon of Turbo-Lax and are on the toilet until August.
That was where I was at (sensitive, I mean; not the toilet), and so I had to write about it. Taking hits and perceived hits. So thank you for reaching out, all of you who did. I appreciate it. To all of you who did not, I know where you live and I watch you through your windows. By the way those pants are not your size: you should really think about dressing in something less revealing. And those socks you are looking for are behind the couch.
Bouncebacks from Setbacks
I cannot stand people who feel the need to label others as a “snowflake”. It is appallingly presumptive and I just want it to STOP, OK? Are you TRYING to hurt me?!?!? But are we all not truly snowflakes, inside, really? We get hurt; we cry. Well, at least, YOU cry. I do not cry since I had my tear ducts surgically removed. But we humans have been this way since the very first Snowflake Caveman accidentally poked another Snowflake Caveman in the eye with his Snowflake Club, and, stole his Snowflake Wife by pointing at her slyly and uttering, “How You Snowflake doooo?”
Men who call other men a snowflake are usually hiding something, namely, their own insecurity, and their own fear about being vulnerable. It is far easier to call a name than to be a name. It is classic diversionary tactics. "Hey! Hey! Look at THAT guy...what a snowflake!! Oh, me? I'm fine! But, NO, look at HIM! WHAT A SENSITIVE BABY SNOWFLAKE!!!" And then they return to their miserable sad lives, out of touch and disconnected from other men...independent...fragile...adrift...uh, kind of like a snowflake.
But have you ever taken the time to examine a snowflake? They are:
- Stunningly beautiful, and
- Amazingly gorgeous, which means stunningly beautiful
So, in a way, being called a snowflake is more or less a compliment, because they are both amazingly gorgeous AND stunningly beautiful. Individual snowflakes all follow slightly different paths from the sky to the ground —and thus encounter slightly different atmospheric conditions along the way. So says NOAA.gov. “Therefore, they all tend to look unique, resembling everything from prisms and needles to the familiar lacy pattern.” Which brings us right back to me watching you. By the way you look great in that lace.
A snowflake is a gorgeous thing. Sensitivity itself…is a gorgeous thing. I mean it. We should show our emotions. After all, we are human. Most of us anyway… I place Caitlyn Jenner in a different, far-off column that I lock in a box, seal in concrete and then launch into the deepest reaches of space. But emotions! They are powerful! For instance, my wife asked me if I stole her thesaurus. Not only was I shocked, but I was appalled. Aghast. Taken aback. Gobsmacked. I showed my emotions. My feelings. My sentiments. My reactions. *hides Thesaurus*
We have a comical phrase in our home when experiencing a potential affront: “You hurt my one feeling!” As if we only have one feeling left to hurt, and are shallow people. But still waters run deep, and I am a deep person who, uh, holds water. In fact, my therapist told me I cannot even identify my own emotions, and I am not sure how I feel about that.
I was sensitive to consecutive bummers happening in my life. Cumulatively, the effect had me a bit downtrodden. I needed to unplug, and I was not doing so. I needed to take a breather, and I had not. I needed to talk to a friend, but I forgot to pay the membership fee. You see, I can rail against laziness, encourage untethering, and advocate for smelling the roses like the best of them, but sometimes advice-givers are not the best at taking their own advice.
Here is me giving advice. And here is me in real life.
Yes, like that.
Physician, heal thyself.
How to Become More Rubbery
Even Elastigirl needed to pull herself together.
So, Ladies and Gentlemen, let me take you on a journey through this magical world of voiceovers, and the side dish of depression that often comes with it. Yes, you heard that right, the world of voiceovers is not just about being the voice behind your favorite cartoon character, or that soothing voice guiding you through your GPS, it is also about the constant battle with depression and feelings of rejection. Last week I used the word “snubbed.” We can often feel snubbed when we are not cast, selected, featured or recognized. By the way, if you ignore military naval vessels, are they called snubmarines? Sorry, dad joke loading...
As a voiceover artist, you are often alone in a small room for hours on end, talking to yourself, and, occasionally, to the fifty people on the other end of your headphones. This can be a bit lonely, especially for those of us who are not great conversationalists. I too get lonely. The lack of human interaction can lead to feelings of isolation and depression. And let us not forget the rejection that comes with voiceovers! You audition for a role, put your heart and soul into it, and pray you are cast, but often times never even hear back. Akin to being stood up on a date, it happens every day.
Something has to give. We can only stretch so far. But lest we forget the bright side of things, at least we are not performing colonoscopies all the live long day. Instead, I get to sit in a comfortable chair all day and talk to myself. It is more or less like being paid to watch TV and eat Cheetos, except I also get to lie to people and get paid for it.
The world of voiceovers is truly a wonderful and exciting place filled with endless colonoscopies. I mean possibilities. However: they also have the occasional bout of depression. But hey! At least we get to be a part of the entertainment industry and pretend to be someone else for a living, since we are all so incurably pathetic and sad. So next time you hear a voiceover, remember the hard work and the loneliness that goes into it from you, from me, and from all of our colleagues, and give a nod to the brave souls who make it all happen. Rubbery people, voiceovers we.
It is a daily grind to keep ourselves positive. The voices in my head have voices in their own head. It can truly be a mind game. So what are some practical ways to maintain elasticity, be like rubber, and bounce back out of depression?
- Talk to someone
- Find a mentor
- Consider the fact that you may be wrong in your assessment, or at least part of it. That consideration opens the doors to truly moving on from grudges.
- If you are doing too much, back off from a few activities like marketing or blogging or networking
- Reflect on Turkey’s recent earthquake – that should put your emotional minutiae in perspective.
- Donate money toward their (and other) relief efforts. Think beyond your own travail. I did.
- Use the world "travail" in a blog.
- Go for a walk, get outside, enjoy nature
- Get (or perform!) a free colonoscopy
- This is a 10th bullet point.
Slights and letdowns, or perceived slights and letdowns, can happen every day. It is in the knowing how to mitigate said letdowns that we find our resilience.
For me, being a massive "Ringsgeek", one of the things that has really brought me a ton of joy is having joined the "Fans of Middle-earth" group on Facebook and enjoying (and posting!) the scores of hilarious memes there. The geek in me screams for joy. I even created my own fledgling LOTR fan group. Join me?
There. You are welcome. Now turn off the lights and close your blinds. I am all out of popcorn and should really be getting home anyway.
YOU HAVE MADE IT ALL THE WAY TO THE END, AND I SALUTE YOU.
- Thanks for reading!
- This is not a commercial site, but if you would prefer to hurl large wads of cash at me, please know that I do not refuse such cash gifts if it means I can pretend I am a church
- Check out my whole UNIVERSE of blogs right HERE!
- This is a fourth bullet point.
AND HEY! WAIT JUST A S.E.C.!
- S-UBSCRIBE & S-HARE!: If you enjoyed this blog, please consider subscribing and sharing with friends and family, and encouraging them to subscribe and share. Offer treats for doing so.
- E-NCOURAGE: Go encourage someone else today with a single, simple sentence of affirmation. Tell them, “I like your earrings”, unless of course they are manly men, in which case you should compliment them on the size of their chainsaw.
- C-OMMENT: I want to hear from you. Please feel free to comment below! Comments with lots of “You’re wonderful” or “You’re the best” will receive instant approval and acclaim.
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The Voices In My Head Blog
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23 thoughts on “How To Bounce Back Even If Not Entirely Made of Rubber”
Way to bounce back! And thanks for helping me find my socks!
GOOD! The ones you were wearing were mismatched and has some loose threads. I would suggest just buying a bulk pack from Costco. The kind with a grey bottom, which is what Gandalf has under his robe.
Another joyous post, and a FUN blog to listen to, Josh!! Thanks for being so real about everything in VO!!
Is there any other way to be, I mean, really? We have to be real and be allowed to be real. I may have been a bit off in my assessment of VOA…but ultimately just a few struggles back to back. That season has passed however. Now back to mirth! 🙂 Go git ’em, Susan!
great followup josh — thanks for giving us An update … we appreciate you. Way to Bounce Back!! 🙂 🙂
My pleasure, Kris! I’m very…uh…bouncy.
I have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome so i’m literally… rubbery. haha. I say it all the time, but your blogs are the best. Thanks for always sharing and hope the B-day was one to remember! That dumb and Dumber meme was freakin perfect by the way. HAHAHA!
It’s the best! Don’t we all do that? “So you’re tellin’ me there’s a chance! I read ya!” Followed by lungs-filling confidence and hope…only to be… ______________________ <<< insert your catastrophe of emotions here. We have to be resilient and be able to bounce back, from whatever the letdown is. Thanks for reading and commenting, Charles Herbert Coats II!
Soooo….Each audition is like an emotional colonoscopy. Got it! That’s why I feel “drained” after several of them!
More or less! And YES, they are draining! Thank God most auditions are only slightly less so, and with so much more potential reward, too.
Go git ’em, David!
Rubber balls, rubber emotions, I’ll be a candidate for the rubber room with all these bouncy, elastically references. Fortunately, you’re there to ground us before the rubber meets the road. Or is that a good thing? Not sure. Either way, much appreciated, Josh! And glad to know that baby, you’re back….
BABY, I’M BACK!! Thanks Laura. All of this elasticity has me feeling like I should finally start yoga. I will keep you posted.
Good follow-up, Josh…and it’s indeed good to have you back. I’m curious, were you wrong in your assessment of the VO Atlanta thing? That’s the vibe I’m getting from this follow-up post.
It’s a long story. The owners/operators of VO Atlanta are upstanding people. I had felt that there was a group of people controlling the strings, ala my “Voiceover Illuminati” comment. However, after a few conversations I’ve been assured that’s not the case. I’m confident I will be speaking in the future…where and when is the question. Either way, it isn’t ultimately the end of the world. I’m a sensitive guy – thus this blog. I can take things personally, as we all can. My goal is to see clearly, always, and its possible I didn’t quite see clearly on that one. It was part of a bigger string of random bummers that coalesced into a difficult season. The future, regardless, is bright. 🙂
Hope yours is too!
A Beautiful Snowflake
One does not simply post too many Dumb & Dumber references, because such a thing cannot possibly exist. They only further enhance the dialogue and points being made.
I’ve always found “snowflake” to be an ironic insult, because we’ve all got this expiration date and we’re really good at forgetting that fact, thusly pretending only other people are capable of melting away. If there’s such thing as humor after death, may they be able to laugh at that irony when it catches up to them.
The only way out of anything is through. Sometimes it comes with a sigh, and sometimes it comes with glee. Many times we must go the gift shop as well.
I’m glad you’re moving in that forward direction, my friend.
“GIFT SHOP GIRL! WHERE ARE YOU!?!?!?” Extra points for you if you understand the reference, which I’m sure you will, so…..extra points for you. 🙂
I do not believe one can have too many Dumb & Dumber references…uh…anywhere. They are the spice of life. Right after paprika of course.
And finally, cue Alanis!
The Only Way Out Is Through
I’ve had this tab open for a couple of days trying to think of something to say. I’m having a really tough week/month and not feeling at all bouncy. Melting like a snowflake in the sun sounds pretty great right now.
Like Michael said, the only way out is through. I’m glad you’re getting through. Thanks for blogging again. 🙂
Sumara, what can I do to help you? You continuously help me. You are fabulous in so many ways. Just let me know, OK? I’m here. You are an awesome blessing to me.
Then the lace it is! I was undecided… hahaha.
Loved that scene from The Incredibles: “I let this happen you know…” “-What are you talking about?!…”
I’m glad you’re doing better – picked that up from the last post. Dad jokes and puns are the best!
I know what you mean about finding balance. There’s a part of my job that I do love, but I don’t love the way, shall I say, it’s done. When that happened, I realized that it is still a job, one that I’m passionate about, but I need to pursue my own stuff outside of work hours – which I started doing a few weeks ago and WOW what that has done for my emotionally. I can see you’re getting it from the LOTR group – awesome stuff!! Snowflake, no, human, yeah…
There’s a song that’s been stuck in my head for weeks now – tonight I finally just got around to listening to the full thing and sing along and it was so fun! It’s really important to do those things that really get you excited about doing something! One needs that one thing so that one’s emotions don’t fly of one’s handle and one inadvertently chew and spit out one’s neighbor, hehe.
Glad you’re feeling better!
Oh one can’t do that to one! Don’t hold one in suspense! What’s the song?!?!? One, tell one!
Hahaha, one cannot but oblige such an one’s request:
One hopes one and one’s other commenters adores said song as much as one should! haha
Oh my! I’ve never heard this one! Creepy beginning, but fun. Has a very Lady Gaga feel to it, no? I would say that don’t impress me much, but it’s a great song, and now: man, I feel like a woman!
It’s such a rare gem! I bought some singles of hers when I was in primary school, I think. Two discs with about 4 songs each. That was the extent of the release for this one as far as I know… Such a pitty tbh!
It does! Now that you mention it. What I love the most about it is how goofy it is, but also how serious it is. I’ve just always loved the song and found it really fun to sing and so catchy! The video I saw for the first time the other day and like you said, has a very creepy side, but not unfitting I suppose. Stinks of a 90’s aesthetic big time, hahaha. Another video that is like that is Ricky Martin and Christina’s Why don’t you let me love you. STUNNING song – incredible video – super cheezy, hahaha.
As for Ka-ching, It’s still the song I love, so hahaha. I’d say it’s Up there with some of her best; always and forever I dare say, maybe not, haha.